mizike's Journal

aka texas mike
5 April
My girlfriend got pissy with me and drove off while my arm was tangled in her seatbelt, and she dragged me for a quarter of a mile before she got pulled over by a police officer. Of course I get arrested, because I'm the one who has the gun, and I'm the one who is on PCP, and I'm the one who fires six rounds into the Chevy. This was all self defense, but I have a shitty lawyer and he just laughs. Oh, and my girlfriend works on an air-force base and has a k-9 that she has sex with. I have videos. And when I get out of this fucking place, I'm going to sell them to her fucking parents. The only joy in my day is when my best friend comes over and tells me about packing bags at the airport. Once he told me about opening a bag marked fragile. When he did, a pit bull jumped out, and gnawed off his ear. He also has problems with his spleen, now. Now, whenever you bark at him, he pisses his pants. We used to go to the movies and have a good time, but I can't resist barking at him now. Everyone laughs at us. My only other friend picks up prostitutes. He affectionately calls them "tooties". He doesn't get the good ones, only crack whores that cost less than five dollars. I would hang out with him, but he is always in strip clubs asking girls to put their thumbs in their asses. My life is actually pretty good now that I think of it. I have to go bark at my friend now.