My family can't fucking cook! It's only as I realize that the cheap pasta and canned sauce spaghetti I made DRUNK AND HIGH is the same that I was fed growing up. Even Grandma can't make an appetizing meal. I think I represent a new evolutionary advance in my lineage, because I've discovered the art of Barbecue. Screw all you not-grilling-over-a-flame-while-I-smoke-a
Red Meat rules, and is more ethical than poultry for you bleedin' hearts!
Oh, and I feel a cold comin on..